It’s been over a month since the start of the war in Ukraine. Honestly, I am still in shock and I am torn between emotions. Part of me is numb, while another is crying out for help; part of me wants to give things to families fleeing from the war while another wants to pretend nothing is going on. But mostly I am angry. I want to shout, ”Tell me! Haven’t we learned anything? Don’t we know that violence brings nothing but violence? When – if ever – will we wake up? ”
The coach in me wants to answer with a strong “Yes.” Of course I believe in change. I believe that we humans can create a different world – even in the face of war, violence, genocide, and all the horrible things we humans have done to each other.
As a mother, I also want to answer this question by saying “Yes,” of course. I need to believe in a brighter future for my children. I have a baby and a six-year-old at home. I can’t give up now. I want to continue to believe and support the notion that a decent life lies ahead for them.
I am weary of all the things that are happening. I want to rest for a moment, take a breath, gather and renew myself before becoming a champion for change with a plan for my future, And I want to help others to do the same. But how?
Years ago, I played basketball for a school team. I wasn’t very good, but every once in a while I made a play. I was too short and not strong enough to really make a difference. I did my best and trained and traveled with the team. Before each game, we were given clear instructions: to rest and take care of ourselves.
Throughout my life, I have found this simple instruction – to rest – an imperative part of coping with strenuous events. In addition to all the personal things each of us has endured, we have been through over two years of Covid, and now we are witnessing war. And just as I said I can hardly take any more, I am going to suggest the antidote to all the frustration, depression, angst, and upset:
Take charge and create a new future.
However, before you jump into creating, I STRONGLY recommend taking a SERIOUS break to recharge, let go, forgive and prepare the ground for your new creation.
For some, taking a break is not that easy. There is a fear that if they stop, they may fall apart. This is a negative belief which can be replaced with something useful: “I can rest and be ok.” Others don’t know how to take a break, or can’t really let go because of limiting beliefs: “When I let go things fall apart.”
But there are many things you can do to recharge and start anew. Here are a few examples:
- Enjoy lunch with friends
- Meditate for five minutes Watch a movie
- Get away for the weekend
- Take a walk in nature
- Turn of your phone for at least one hour
- Work on a craft project
- Help someone else
- Read a book
- Forgive someone/let go of an old pain
Once you feel refreshed and recharged you can get started on your creation. It could be a project in your house, kitchen, office, or basement. Or, if you have your own business, create a new strategic plan for future growth.
When coaching clients come to me, I often suggest taking on a small project. I recommend something that is at least 50% realistic, achievable, and fun, and will provide instant gratification. Here is a personal example that combines these two elements:
Yesterday I took myself on a gorgeous hike. Despite feeling tired, I woke up at 5:40 and was in the car by 6:10, and arrived at my destination – Nahal Tavor – some two hours later. The weather was amazing, my phone was off, and I was ready to let go of my sadness, upset, stress, and outrage. At the beginning of the hike I set an intention to let go, and I was ready to see how the day would unfold.
Not long after I arrived, I met someone who offered me a ride down to the stream. I was a bit afraid to walk among the cows on the path and was glad to take her up on her offer. What began as a ride turned into a joint hike with deep, meaningful conversation. When I climbed back into the car, I felt both tired and uplifted. Something had shifted, and as a result of my taking care of myself, I was now open to new creativity.
How did I harness this new-found energy? I decided to work on two sets of “incompletions” in my life. One related to my personal life, and the second related to my business.
The details don’t matter, but If you have been reading my blogs you know that I’m a big believer in creating from the inside out. Things like identifying your values and setting intentions are key. If you’d like to receive the series of three videos from my recent goal-setting challenge please sign up. Or, if you’re curious about setting business goals without having to write a 100-page business plan, I will send you my business goal-setting sheets.
The best antidote to negativity is creativity, but it’s important to have the right frame of mind. Make sure to be rested, clear, and intentional.
You’ll be amazed at what is possible.