Many people come to me because they want something in their life to change.
They want to improve their health, strengthen a relationship, grow a business, feel more confident, sleep better, or finally move beyond a pattern that has followed them for years. What they often have in common is that they already know what they want to do. They have read the books, listened to the podcasts, gathered information, and spent plenty of time thinking about the problem.
Yet they still find themselves stuck.
In this episode of Something New Is Possible, I wanted to talk about why that happens and why information alone is often not enough to create lasting change.
We Know More Than We Think We Do
One of the biggest misconceptions about change is that the missing piece is knowledge. We tell ourselves that if we could just find the right strategy, the right technique, or the right piece of advice, everything would finally click into place.
In reality, most people already have a good sense of what would move them forward. They know they should exercise more, set healthier boundaries, have the difficult conversation, get more rest, or take the next step toward a goal. The challenge is rarely a lack of information. More often, there is another part of them that is not fully aligned with what they consciously want.
Why We Repeat the Same Patterns
We tend to think of ourselves as rational beings, but our decisions are influenced by much more than logic. Emotions, past experiences, learned beliefs, and subconscious survival responses all play a role in how we move through the world.
This is one of the reasons patterns can be so persistent. Even when a pattern is no longer serving us, it may still feel familiar. And familiar often feels safer than change.
What looks like procrastination, avoidance, or self-sabotage from the outside may actually be an attempt by some part of us to stay safe based on experiences we have not fully examined or processed.
Looking Beneath the Surface
This is where muscle testing becomes such a valuable tool in my work.
What I appreciate about muscle testing is that it helps us move beyond the stories we tell ourselves and begin exploring what may be happening at a deeper level. It can reveal beliefs, emotional responses, and subconscious associations that are not immediately obvious through conversation alone.
Many times, the goal itself is not the issue. Someone may want to grow a business but have unconscious fears around visibility or criticism. Someone may want to improve their health but carry years of judgment or disappointment related to exercise. Someone may want more rest while holding a deeply rooted belief that slowing down is not safe.
When we identify those deeper layers, we begin to understand why change has felt so difficult.
My Own Experience With Sleep
In the episode, I share a personal example involving sleep.
For years I focused on the practical side of the problem. But as I continued doing deeper work, I discovered there were beliefs and emotional patterns connected to relaxation, safety, and experiences from my childhood that I had never fully addressed.
Sleep was simply where those patterns were showing up.
Once I began working with the underlying issues rather than just the symptom itself, things started to shift in a meaningful way.
Creating Alignment Instead of More Effort
Many people approach change by trying harder.
Sometimes that works for a while, but it can also be exhausting.
I often think of the subconscious and unconscious mind as creating obstacles in a stream. The more obstacles there are, the harder the water has to work to keep moving. When we begin identifying and clearing those obstacles, movement becomes easier and more natural.
The goal is not to force ourselves forward. The goal is to create greater alignment between what we consciously want and what is happening beneath the surface.
A Different Approach to Change
Perhaps the most important thing I have learned through this work is that change happens best when it is accompanied by curiosity and self-acceptance.
Many people assume that if they are struggling, they need more discipline or more willpower. I often encourage them to ask a different question.
Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” ask, “What might this pattern be trying to show me?”
That question creates space for understanding, and understanding often creates the conditions for lasting change.
Key Takeaways
- Knowing what to do and being able to do it are not always the same thing.
- Repeating patterns often point to deeper beliefs and emotional responses.
- Muscle testing can help uncover subconscious influences that may be affecting behavior.
- Lasting change becomes easier when the conscious and subconscious mind are working together.
- Curiosity is often far more effective than self-criticism.
When we begin to understand what is happening beneath the surface, we create the possibility for something new. And that is where meaningful change begins.
